i miss that pic. a pic which brings a lot of concerns and controversy. maybe that's the best picture to describe my feelings at the moment. or whenever im feeling hurt, but at the same time, i think that i am fine. just the best pic to describe my feelings. a symbol of the silent pain.
i know if my bestest buddy, fahmy, were to see this, he'll kill me right away. haha. yeah. he hates to see the pic so much. haiz. he kept imagining that it was my arm. silly you! you know me very well, best friend. so you must know that hanis isn't that stupid after all. i remembered putting that pic at my display on msn, and the second he saw it, he gets so mad and begged and forced me to delete it that sec. if not, he said, "i'll break the friendship, nis..." haha. yeah, that's how serious that pic means to him. but thank-god, i hope he didnt have my link. if not, who knows he'll come running at my doorstep at this very second. and to you fahm, u are really a true friend. thanks buddy. and pls continue to worry about me. haha.
im feeling so hurt, confused, lost and insecure at this moment. and sad of cuz. sometimes i feel that life is unfair. or maybe life is never fair. but then again, who would ever understands me?
im known generally to be a very gentle and soft-spoken. but yet, that doesnt mean you could bully me and step on my head. that doesnt mean you could say anything as you wish. pls remind yourself that i am just an ordinary girl with feelings. i have my own pride. what sins did i ever do to you that makes you say such cheap things? if you meant it to be a joke, let me tell you this. its way-off the limit. you dont have the right to say that kind of rude stuff to me. nor to anybody else. yes, i am very soft-hearted. so does that gives you every opportunity to hina me untill to that extend? before you want ppl to respect you, pls show some respect to others. i know you might be blogging about this issue, saying that it was all meant to be a joke, but what the hell? nobody would ever dare to joke untill that extend. you tell me, "...this isn't the hanis i know...the old hanis is manja and cheerful..." okay, fine. let me ask you this. would you still be so sweet, so manja and so cheerful after someone hina you?? pls do some thinking. i am me. i am the same old me. only that, when it comes to my pride and my heart, i dont treat it lightly. hey, org bodoh je lah yang leh duduk diam lepas dah kena hina mcm gitu sekali. and let me tell you this. I AM NOT STUPID!
i dont care what you want to think of me now. what i know is that, i wont let any single soul step on my head, or plays with my feelings. i learned not to be a fool. if you want to say that i've change, yes, maybe i had. i've learned to be firm. i can be very sweet, gentle, soft-spoken and feminine. yes, i can. but dont you ever play with fire.
and to the rest of the blogger, im so sorry with the harsh words. just that i need to let my anger out. so pls excuse me. i feel much better now.
to that someone, i guess its the right time to declare. u dont need to tell me who's my peminat is, because i know who he is. and i seriously got nothing against that. its not a crime to have peminat.
and to my dear clown, who never fails to bring a smile even when times are really bad for me, thank-you very much. i appreciate every single thing and time that you've given me. u gave me strength to step forward. maybe i should have you as my knight, who would protect me every seconds from the perils that sure will come. syg awak. *hugs*
love you all. goodbye.
{{ 3:12 AM -
Little Memories Of The Past
